I want to be sick

Photo credit: christigee.com

I wish to have a special ailment –probably epilepsy, something that draws the attention of people to me. An ailment that would make people –not necessary pity me-understand me and identify with me. An ailment that would serve as an excuse for all the times that I have failed, something to hold responsible for all the things that I couldn’t achieve.
Then, I remember that the world don’t even need that anymore. Nobody expect you to have an excuse for your shortcomings anymore, no thanks to the likes of Cobhams who defied the odds. I remember that sick people only get preferential treatments and the pity party for a very short period before they become a burden to their caregivers –before they are expected to start getting better (see! Another responsibility).

So, I decided to rather stay whole and strong. I would rather not be sick. I would rather face my falls head on, and get up as soon as I can to try again. I will rather gather the pieces from the fall together and make a beautiful patched vase which will eventually appear beautiful that it becomes a monument that the world would come see. I would rather become the subject of attention for the positive changes that I will make in my world and the world to come.

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So, I would rather get my attention from affecting the world positively, rather than being sick.


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