Please don’t kill us!

Moyinoluwa Okunloye

Someone said that no one ever dies alone; you die taking some people along with you. I find that to be very true. I have a front row seat to witnessing the death of a dearly beloved one and I can say for a fact, that his death killed so many people.

While I was younger, I had a lot of people in my neighbourhood aspire to be like him; they all focused on going to school, study what he studied and then go ahead to become exactly what he became. But when he died, that changed. A profession that was said to be riddled with lots of deaths because of its sensitive issues but was tolerated by my peers just because there was someone around them who appeared to be doing so well again became a nightmare immediately the news of his death hit the neighbourhood. Parents who had encouraged their children to go ahead and be like him were unapologetically begging their children to think of something else to do. No one wants to lose their kid. Thus, lots of dreams and aspirations were shattered. Just because one man died.

His siblings became a shadow of themselves. Someone whom they loved, who they confided in and admired was gone. A part of them with whom they share a connection deeper that what could be seen had died and so, they felt lost. How do we live without him?” they asked. His parents even lost the will to live. His mother wanted to literally die with him and His father even though he died eight years after, had died from the day his beloved son was buried.

I cannot detail what became of his inquisitive, smart, fun loving daughter who looked up to him but became melancholic and almost without a bearing after she heard the news of his death. And all this, even though his death was an accident. He did not kill himself; it just happened.

It got me thinking how you would think to decide the end for yourself regardless of what went wrong with you. Well, I know life can be tough (I do know this) and I know that occasionally, thoughts of a permanent end to pain might creep in especially when it becomes too much to bear. However, as much as no one really knows if putting an end to life really ends the pain or opens the door to another kind of pain, it is also important not to murder me in a bid to permanently end your pain. Try to think about what happens next after you are gone. Think about parents who would be laden with thoughts of what they did wrong to raise you right or what they did not do to make you think ending your life was the only resort. Think about the guilt that would kill them gradually until they eventually give up the ghost.

Consider people who you may or may not know who see you as their hero. The day you die inadvertently put a pause, if not a stop, to their dreams and what they had always hoped they would do to be just like you. Now, think about what precedent that would be for anyone going through similar situation who might, on your account think it is ok just to give up.

Occasionally, most of us come to a point where the willingness to fight appear to be out of sight and then for a second, all we think about at that point is how to get out of that state of mind, perhaps permanently. All I am saying is Suicide has never solved any problem and it never will. It only compounds the problem; it discourages people and suck the hope out of many. So, please stay alive; don’t kill us. Find the willingness to live and take it one day at a time. Don’t get ahead of yourself by
of how tomorrow will be just by the outcome of today, you don’t know how tomorrow will turn out for you. One seemingly unbearable pain today might be a tool for your exoneration tomorrow. So, please hang in there; the destiny of many hang on your survival. Keep others alive by staying alive. We love you, please don’t die! Don’t kill us!

Photo Credit: www-supportisp-org

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